So simple, even a child understands

On the way to her softball game tonight, Middle Sister saw the many signs dotting the town and the high school for the upcoming Relay for Life. She wanted to know what that event is. It sounds harmless and fun: high school students having fun, staying up all night in exchange for money for the American Cancer Society.

Then she wanted to know why we don't have a sign for the Relay for Life in front of our house. I told her that this is because the American Cancer Society is involved in supporting Planned Parenthood--which means supporting abortion. Also, I let her know that even though abortion has been shown to raise a woman's risk of developing certain cancers, the American Cancer Society still supports abortion.

After she let that sink in, she told me that this makes no sense. If you are fighting cancer, why support doing something that could make you get cancer?

I don't have an answer for her. Perhaps the American Cancer Society would like to explain this to my 11-year-old daughter. Until then, we won't be buying that purple ribbon. We'll save our money to buy diapers for the crisis pregnancy center.

Peter Pan Syndrome

Little Brother just said to me, "Hey Mom, guess what? When you're a grownup, you get to do whatever you want, and play video games when you get home from work."

I answered, "Yes, but grownups have to do other things too, besides playing video games. They can't play video games all the time."

Little Brother thought about that for a second. "Yeah. They can play toys, too!"

Do You Hear What I Hear?

It's that "open the windows wide" time of year in my part of the country. And when the windows are open you hear everything that you've been insulated from all winter long: the traffic on the main road a couple of blocks away, the freight train 2 miles to the west, music from the passing cars with their windows open, plenty of birdsong, and the neighbors' loud party after midnight on a Friday night.

Another neighbor and I were commiserating over that party, since we were both woken up by it, and she observed that the people having the party probably didn't realize just how loud they were, and that sound carries so well in the middle of the night with no competing noise, so that we all could hear exactly what was being said by everyone at the party.

She mentioned that it was a reminder to her that she needs to watch how she speaks when she's outside, or even in her own home with the windows open, in case someone hears. And I know the feeling. I am much more likely to speak to a family member through clenched teeth in my own home than I am in a public place like a supermarket.

That's certainly not something I should be proud of, however. An answer through clenched teeth is never going to be remembered for its gentleness.

But I don't want the motivation for changing my ways to just be a need for company manners: "someone might hear." What really struck me as I was thinking about this is that Someone will hear. God hears. In 1 Samuel, we read: "for man looks on the outward appearance, but the LORD looks on the heart" (1 Sam. 16:7) And in Matthew 6:4 Jesus mentions that the Father sees what we do in secret.

The Morning Offering is a good way to start the day. If you have little children they can learn this simple one:

Good morning, dear Jesus, this day is for you.
I offer you all that I think, say, and do. Amen.

"All that I think, say, and do..." If I'm offering all that to God, I'd better do things with a kinder spirit.

Almost as sweet as if he gave it away

Little Brother and Adventure Boy (he came back after our errands) are running around here playing with some little toy. Adventure Boy has it at the moment. Little Brother told him, "I wish I had another one so you could have it."

For a 5-year-old, that's almost as generous as it gets.

Why Am I Still Here?

I've got several errands on the calendar for today:
Shopping at the warehouse store, a quick supermarket run, a stop at the post office, and picking up Mom's pizza peel at the Kitchen & Linen Big Box store (she wants this for Mother's Day). I've also got to pick up a bird feeder that someone listed on freecycle. We love feeding the birds here.

So why am I still at home, doing laundry, tidying up the kitchen and checking email?

Little Brother and Adventure Boy have been outside for the past half hour, hunched over an earthworm they found on the sidewalk. They're busy taking care of their New Best Friend. They filled Middle Sister's old toy puppy crate with dirt, ran for a paper cup of water, and gently scooped up the worm in a sand shovel.

Two little boys in blue sweatshirts with the hoods up, crouching over a pile of dirt in the middle of the driveway...how could I break that up?

I think the jasmine rice, mushrooms, pizza peel, packages and bird feeder can wait until after lunch.

Special Person's Day

Today at Middle Sister's school, it was "Special Person's Day."

I was feeling a little put out because the children and their Special Person were going to attend church together, but it wasn't their usual First Friday Mass. It would only be a Prayer Service. I was pleasantly surprised.

After a snack time when the Special People were entertained by the middle-school-age children, we picked up Middle Sister in her classroom and headed to the church. We participated in a Communion service celebrated by one of the deacons.

This deacon gave an excellent homily on how Mary is a Special Person who should be a role model for all of us, and mentioned that our Special People would be better role models than sports figures, movie stars and rap musicians. At the end, we were reminded that Mary leads us to Christ.

On our way out, Little Brother commented, "I like Special Person's Day. It's all about eating, singing, and church."

UPDATE: After my conversation with Jackie in the comment box I emailed the principal and asked "Why no Mass?" She assured me that the newly-installed pastor had asked her the same thing and he promised that in future years there will be Mass at Special Person's Day. I couldn't ask for better news than that. This pastor has gotten very involved with the school in a short time and everyone is thrilled.

Wake Me Up When May Is Over

TheDad read the article that estimates the stay-at-home mom's salary for this year. He very nicely offered to take me out to dinner sometime, since there's not a spare $138,000 in the family budget for my paycheck.

That'll be great, and I'll look forward to it. But I know very well that it won't be happening anytime soon.

It's a rare day in May that we don't have at least one thing on the calendar already. Some days are double- or even triple-booked. Between TheDad and Big Brother's Boy Scout meetings, Big Brother's track meets, Middle Sister's softball and volleyball games, my 2-hour-per-week tutoring job, Big Brother's trips to a local air show, whitewater rafting and Hershey Park (all through school), Middle Sister's Field Day (on a holyday of obligation), and my Secular Franciscan gatherings, we're hardly all home at the same time. This stay-at-home mom isn't home much.

I know that I shouldn't complain. I have three healthy (and reasonably happy) children. Two of them are involved in healthy activities like sports, visiting a local nursing home, Flight Club, Alternate Activities Club (to keep thrill-seekers from using drugs, tobacco or alcohol). I have a (very) part-time tutoring job that I enjoy. If my husband isn't home, it's because he's either at work or taking one of more of the kids to a sports event. I know that I shouldn't wish this time away, because the kids are growing up amazingly quickly.

Lord, I feel overwhelmed by my family's activities. Help me to realize that this is a normal part of my children's growing-up years. Help me to give them the guidance to choose their activities well. Help me to create a balance between family life, sports and school. And help me to savor the moments spent on cold metal bleachers, watching Big Brother run around a track, cheering for Middle Sister as she catches a fly ball, and showing Little Brother what he can do when he's as big as they are. Help me to remember that it's all worthwhile, and to work out a home routine that will get us through the coming busy weeks.

And now I must get Little Brother back into the car as we head to Middle Sister's school for "Special Person's Day."

A Cure for Bleacher Butt

Last night I attended Middle Sister's softball game. Those metal bleachers...OUCH!! (And they're cold, too!) On the way home I mentioned that I want to get one of those Stadium Seats for future games.

A little farther up the road we passed a diner that is slated to be demolished so a Walgreen's can move in. I know Middle Sister and her friend think that Walgreen's is the Ultimate Shopping Destination, so I shared this news with her.

"OOOO! I love Walgreen's! They have everything! I bet they even have those stool softeners that you wanted!"

What Not to Buy

Big Brother just informed me, "Mom, we need straws."

Middle Sister asked him why he needs them.

The answer: "I'm not going to tell, because then Mom won't buy them."

UPDATE: They found a straw somewhere and there is NO WAY I'm buying them any more. They loaded it up with Q-Tips and used it as a blowgun.

No thanks.

After I advised him that it's a good idea to breathe while humming along to his MP3 player, Big Brother invited me:

"You try singing 45 seconds of an instrumental and see how you feel."

Oh yeah. I might have laughed at him too. But I am wondering why he's trying to sing a 5-minute guitar solo....

May, the Month of Mary

In the month of May we honor the Blessed Mother in special ways. At Catholic Culture, we can find a wealth of practices and prayers that honor Mary. Moneybags has a wonderful post about the Power of One Hail Mary, and the illustration he used was so beautiful that I am republishing it here.

One devotion that I have recently begun to practice is the Franciscan Crown Rosary. Friar Charles has the whole story on this devotion, including how to pray it and where it came from. You don't have to be a Franciscan to pray the Franciscan Crown. It's based on the Seven Joys of Mary:
The Annunciation
The Visitation
The Nativity
The Adoration of the Magi
The Finding of Jesus in the Temple
The Resurrection
The Assumption and Coronation of the Blessed Mother

Franciscans have a great devotion to Mary:

In his devotion to the Mother of Christ, the Franciscan, who is united with and transformed into Christ, makes Mary his own Mother. How can it be otherwise, for it was Mary who begot Christ, and hence it is Mary who has given the True Life to the Franciscan. Mary is our Mother because she is the Mother of the Head of the Mystical Body, of which we are members -- she is the one Mother of the One Christ. Thus Francis "embraced the Mother of Jesus with an indescribable love, because she made the Lord of Majesty our brother."

So if you're looking for a new way to honor the Blessed Mother, why not learn to pray the Franciscan Crown? Join me in this beautiful devotion during the month of May.

A Hypothetical Situation, and an Informal Poll

Let's say that you have informed your child that you will be vacuuming the family room after dinner. The child has been given ample and REPEATED warning that all tiny little toys and pieces of toys should be picked up. The child has also been given plenty of time to accomplish this task, a place where the toys and pieces of toys can be placed, and a little guidance ("Check under the couch!")

What age must your child be before you are no longer duty-bound by the Cleaning Mama Code of Guilt to eviscerate your vacuum bag because you heard multiple Rattles of Plastic Death while vacuuming said family room?

I'm just asking.

This question has nothing to do with the Lego and Playmobil bits that may or may not be currently residing within the bowels of my Oreck.

Members Only

This morning Little Brother was up extra early, and wanted to get under the blanket on the love seat, where he stretched out and took up the whole thing.

When Middle Sister came downstairs, there was no room for her, so she curled up on the couch.

Then, I was ready to begin Morning Prayer, and I sat down on the other end of the couch with my prayer book, only to be interrupted by Little Brother's very loud declaration:

"HEY! You're not a member of that couch!"

The Saints Meme

I was double-tagged on this one! Sarah and Ellen both asked me to do this meme:

List four favorite saints, two favorite blessed, and a person who you think should be a saint. As Sarah said, these are today's answers. Tomorrow's could be different...there are so many saints and so little time!

First of all, special mention goes to the Blessed Mother. I can't lump her in with "saints" because I think she is even beyond that, being conceived without sin.

SAINTS:
St. Francis of Assisi--my inspiration
St. Gianna Beretta Molla, who is a wonderful example of sacrificial love and motherhood
St. Francis de Sales, whose writings I am beginning to explore
St. Elizabeth of Hungary, who is being remembered in a special way by the Secular Franciscans throughout the world on the 800th anniversary of her birth. She is the Patroness of the Secular Franciscan Order, a mother, a widow, and one who worked tirelessly on behalf of the poor. (Do check the link above and read about her life--fascinating!)


BLESSEDS:
Blessed Teresa of Calcutta--I am awestruck by her work and her wonderful writings
Blessed Junipero Serra, because I have had, since childhood, a fascination with the Franciscan missionaries who inspired others to share our Faith

SHOULD BE/COULD BE:
Servant of God John Paul the Great (needs no explanation, I'm sure)

TAG!!
Sue, sfo
Michelle
The Kitchen Madonna

Vocabulary

Michelle's not the only one whose kids are working to increase their vocabulary!

However, in Little Brother's case, he's making up acronyms to fit his needs.

"Mom, can you please make me some breakfast?"

"What would you like?"

"TWOST!"

He's very delighted that I figured out that he wanted Two Slices of Toast. Now he wants to use this new word as much as possible.

"Are my TWOST ready?"

I'm guessing that this child has a military or government career ahead of him, with this kind of talent.

Books Meme

Ellen at From Across the Net has tagged me for this meme:

What are you currently reading?

It's pretty rare that I have only one book going at once, and right now is no exception. Generally, though, I can only handle one fiction book at a time, but any number of nonfiction. So, in no particular order, I've got:
To Love, Honor and Vacuum by Sheila Wray Gregoire
The Overachievers: The Secret Lives of Driven Kids by Alexandra Robbins
Introduction to the Devout Life by St. Francis de Sales
Donna Marie Cooper O'Boyle's The Heart of Motherhood
Ungodly Rage by Donna Steichen (the content of this book upsets me so much that I can take it in small doses only--but I feel like I must finish it because it's an important subject)

No fiction at the moment, because I just finished reading a book my mom mailed me: Jane Austen in Scarsale, or Love, Death and the SATs by Paula Marantz Cohen

Obviously I need to dig into the very tall pile of books awaiting my attention and find some more fiction in there.

OK, now go check out Ellen's blog. She's cool. Plus, our sons attend the same high school--though her son graduates in June and mine is just a lowly freshman.

And no, Debbie, I have not forgotten about the Fictional Characters meme. I'm just having a Real Hard Time narrowing down my choices!! Please be patient!

Fashion Sense

Middle Sister is sitting here browsing through the J.C.Penney kids' catalog that came in today's mail.

"What's with the missing-skirt look?" she asked as she pointed to an outfit with capri leggings and a long top. "It's kinda creepy."

Finally--we agree on something fashion-related!

Don't Take Your Child to Work Day

As it does every year, this Manufactured Occasion crept up on me—I didn’t realize it was here until suddenly the news programs were all talking about it, and so were the kids on the bleachers at softball. We’ve never “observed” it in our household, not when it was designed For Girls Only, and not now that it’s unisex.

Why not?

Well, first of all, until a couple of years ago we didn’t have a child old enough to really benefit by going to work with a parent and participating in what that parent does all day. Does a first-grader really get that much out of watching Mom attend meetings? Or is that first-grader busy with a computer game at a desk near Dad? I really think that children under middle-school age won’t benefit from spending the day in the workplace.

Beyond that, all the kids already know what I do all day, if they stop to pay attention. They’re here enough of the time. And summer vacation’s coming—so every day will be “Stay Home with Mom Day.”

All of our kids know that TheDad does work involving computers. He’s brought work home on evenings, weekends, and when he thought it might snow hard enough to close the office. They’ve seen him hunched over a computer keyboard typing code like crazy, then walking around thinking for a little while, then typing some more. Do they need to watch him do this for TEN HOURS STRAIGHT? TheDad has been known to skip lunch more often than not….

I asked TheDad if many people at his office had brought children. He named a couple, and I asked what the children did all day while their parents wrote code and attended meetings. “They got in the way,” he replied.

On the day before Take Your Child to Work Day, I sat on the bleachers at Middle Sister’s softball game, listening to all the players’ younger siblings discussing their plans for the next day. One girl (third grade or younger) was going to teach middle- and high-school foreign language with her mom. One first-grade boy was planning to play computer games on his dad’s work computer all day. Apparently he already knew that there wouldn’t be much to see there. Meanwhile, another child started whining that he was going to have to go to school. I said to him, “But someone has to go to school, or this girl (the teacher’s daughter) won’t get to teach Spanish to anyone! What would all the teachers’ kids do, if all the students went to work with their parents?”

WAIT A MINUTE! Maybe that’s the idea here! Maybe this whole wacky scheme is really a plot by the teachers’ union to get a day off at a slow time of year. It’s been 2 weeks since “Spring Break” (can’t call it Easter Vacation anymore, if they even schedule it for Easter Week anymore), and there are no holidays until Memorial Day (is it still OK to call it Memorial Day? I hope I haven’t missed another PC-renaming opportunity).

So, just how much productivity is lost because these employees and/or their administrative assistants are spending the day amusing first-graders with special lunches, computer games and free rein in the copy room? What’s being accomplished here?

Fill in the blank

Other?
I think Middle Sister covered all the bases already. Wonder what she would put in that spot?

Would YOU buy this book?

I saw this booklet on the magazine rack in the local supermarket, right next to quality publications like the National Enquirer and Weekly World News.

Normally, I'm all for those "Idiot's Guide" books, or the "Dummies" series. I think they have great explanations for technical stuff, and I've bought and used several of them. But this title deserves all the mockery that it is sure to invite:

"Baby Names for Dummies."